Asking about suicidal thoughts

Studies show that asking a young person directly about suicide does not plant the idea. Not asking is the bigger risk.

Parents and teachers often miss children's suicidal thoughts. In one study, parents knew about only a quarter of the 8-year-olds who reported them.

Ask plainly and calmly: 'Sometimes when people are this sad, they think about dying or wish they could be with the person who died. Do you ever think like that?'

Take any yes seriously. Never dismiss it as attention-seeking. Stay with them, and contact your GP, a crisis line, or emergency services if they are in danger now.

A 'no plan' answer doesn't mean safe, and a 'fine' today doesn't end the conversation. Keep checking in.

With teenagers, make a safety plan together: what they'll do and who they'll contact if things get bad. Plans they help write work. 'Promise me you won't' contracts don't.